The Wrong Question

We ask it a lot, we hear it a lot, we think it even when we don't ask it.  It's the secret fear of homeschooling mothers the world over "am I doing enough?"

But see, that's the wrong question.  While we worry about checkboxes and "essential" learning and what other people think of us when they meet our children, other, much bigger questions loom in the background.

What are they absorbing?  What are the values in the air we breath?  In the words we speak when we're not thinking? In the things we do when we think no one is looking?

Is there any chance that our children's bad habits - the ones that bug and embarrass us - actually represent our silent curriculum.  No, I'm not saying that every bad or annoying thing your child does is all your fault - I'm sure they came up with one or two things all by themselves...

What needs to change in this home where we "do" school?  I can tell you, a lot of things need to change in this home.  Some I already know, many - somewhat depressingly - will emerge over the coming years.  I need to stop whinging (I wonder where the kids got that from?).  I need to call a moratorium on negativity and learn to really and truly speak the truth in love.  I need to spend less time on selfish, time-wasting pursuits (such as mindlessly surfing internet shopping sites for the perfect... whatever) and invest myself much more in relationships... including the really tough ones.  I need to stop turning my back on the things that I don't want to see and face up to ugly realities - like, my children aren't perfect.

Really guys, if we ask the right questions and seek to answer them with action, the rest will fall into place.  We will do "enough", and not only that, we'll do enough of the right things. We'll bypass all the fluff because we'll see it for what it really is.

Here's the challenge: do we have the courage to start honestly asking the right questions?