If This Doesn't Pass

Today is a good day to write this - a subject that has been on my mind for years now.  I feel rotten today - probably food poisoning.  It feels like my intestines are being tied up in knots and my whole body wants to collapse in on itself.  I'm pretty confident right now that this will pass in a day or two.  A few years ago, though, I felt like this and it didn't pass so quickly.  For weeks - I'm not sure exactly how long - I felt like this.  It was long enough for me to start wondering if this was a permanent condition, but short enough that I didn't take it to the medical profession (I tend to resist going to doctors).

"This too shall pass" is a popular saying to share with those who are suffering.  For many, it's a source of true comfort.  But what if "this" - whatever it is - doesn't pass?  There have been times in my life when it would have been more comforting for someone to say to me: "don't worry, one day you'll die".  The prospect of death was much more reassuring than that of a life with less (whether physical, emotional or spiritual) pain.  I should qualify that by saying that the comfort of death lies in the promise of eternal life to come afterward.  I wouldn't find it so inviting if it was the final end to everything.

What if, for the forseeable future - perhaps even the rest of a lifetime - "this" won't pass?  Some problems actually just get bigger and older with time.  Pain isn't so bad if it's just for a day, but if it goes on and on unrelenting, then what?  And sometimes, we can flippantly throw someone that phrase "this too shall pass" with no understanding of what is really under the pain they are experiencing.  What people complain about is not necessarily what's really hurting.  It's a lot easier to talk about the flu or a difficult colleague at work than it is to explain an abused childhood (I'm deliberately using an example that doesn't apply to me).

What I personally find comforting is not simply the hope of a trial or challenge coming to an end in this lifetime, but knowing that behind every pain, God has a purpose and a plan.  I try to ask myself (have I said this before?) "what am I learning?"  Because, you know what?  I want this pain to be proactive!  If I'm hurting, I want it to achieve something!  I don't want to just be hanging around waiting for the hard stuff to be over and done with so I can get to the good stuff.  I can't get to the good stuff unless I learn from the hard stuff.

I don't tend to ask others in pain "what are you learning from this?" because I figure it's likely to come across as pretty insensitive and arrogant.  But I probably won't say "this too shall pass" either.  It might not pass.  This might be part of the rest of your physical life.  But God has a purpose and a plan. Do we want in on it or not?  Excuse me while I go and study. :)