The Definition of Me

That title does sound very self-centred, but my intent is to be introspective and not tell YOU what the definition of 'you' is. That's for you to decide for yourself.

Life here at Joyful Mornings has had some ups and downs. During the 'downs' I got to feeling pretty sorry for myself (OK, let's make that A LOT sorry for myself). Since many of those downs have been due to circumstances beyond my control, my unhappiness was, of course, Someone Else's fault.

More recently, things have been more up, but I have found myself continuing to be unhappy. This was the beginning of the Great Revelation. I should already have understood from the scriptures such as the Apostle Paul's statement that he had learned "in whatever state, to be content" (and that was after some pretty harrowing experiences, to put it mildly). What I should have understood already is that I choose peace and contentment... or not.

It's not the bed less-than-perfectly made (not by me, of course!), or the toys still on the floor after they were meant to have been put away that rob me of my joy. Nor is it the far bigger hurts. It is me. (Yes, I know I should say 'I', but I'm not gonna). Me who robs me of contentment. I am the definition of me. Not Someone Else, not Unavoidable Circumstances.

Hang on, though, I'm not done. This process of contentment needs God. Without Him guiding me through, there can be no peace. With Him, there can. Joy is a fruit of the spirit, therefore it is impossible without God, but possible in ALL circumstances with God - yes, ALL. God's power is not limited by our pathetic human perceptions of joy, fear, pain, loss and contentment.

One other thing - joy and contentment don't require an absence of pain. Some of the most peaceful times in my inner life have been the most outwardly tumultuous and painful. Even in the midst of sobs that seem to tear the body from top to bottom, there can be joy and contentment... with God. Jesus Christ epitomized this in His crucifixion and death. Joy is a fruit of the spirit. Christ had a full measure of the spirit at all times. Therefore Christ was joyful even while in utter agony of mind, body and spirit. QED.

So, today I choose joy. God grant me the wisdom, strength and maturity to choose it tomorrow and ever after.

The Price You Pay

I'm only "allowed" to have some precious alone time if I write in this blog, so, to keep The Raamonster happy, here I am - writing...

I'm undergoing a crisis again. It's just one of those cycles. Sometimes it's the garden that's overwhelming, sometimes the laundry. A lot of the time it's controlling my temper. Right now I'm feeling overwhelmed by children. I just need to look at those priorities again. Remind myself where I'm going. Getting lost is to be expected when you forget your destination!

Well, I've done my bit - written something down. Now I'm going to enjoy my time!

Stand Up For The TRUTH, Otherwise, Stand Down

Being a mother is a very emotional journey. In my experience, it is made even more emotional and tumultuous by the many highly-charged opinions fired from all directions regarding pretty much every aspect of parenting. We mamas have tremendous power to hurt each other when we fling our emotional baggage at each other.

Don't get me wrong, I believe absolutely in standing up for the truth. What I'm coming to realise is how careful I need to be in defining something as right. Do my beliefs stand up to being tested against the Word of God? Am I giving unsolicited advice from my own overactive brain, or is it grounded in Truth? Yeah, that's right, truth with a capital 'T'.

Let me give an example: I am against immunisation. Why? I believe that trusting the inadequate (immunisations are not guaranteed 100% effective) defenses against disease, manufactured by inadequate human beings, is expressing a lack of faith in God and His supreme design. Hang on, what does the bible say? "Thou shalt not immunise thy children"? Nope. "Thou shalt completely trust in God to heal or prevent every illness or injury without outside intervention"? Nope. I'm still against immunisation, so what's my conclusion?

My conclusion is this: if someone wants my opinion on immunisation, I will give it - VERY carefully and gently (at least, I'll try - after all, I'm not going to get it right every time). If it comes to disagreement, I may challenge other people's views if it is appropriate. If it gets emotional, that's where I'll stand down. That seems like a pretty simple formula, it's the implementation that will be the challenge.

I could give lots of other examples, but I won't. It's so easy for me to hop up on my soapbox and expound on, well, just about anything really, but I really think it's important to stop and think. Oftentimes I'm fuelled by pride. I want to prove without any shadow of a doubt that what I'M doing with MY children is right. Well, here's a wake-up call - it is a 100% guarantee that I'm doing a whole bunch of things WRONG because I'm human, not God!

So here's my plan: before I launch into lecture #3856 on The Correct Method of Parenting, I'm going to ask myself, "Is this God's Truth, or is it my truth?" And then, I'm either going to stand up for the Truth, or I'm going to stand down.

What Is REALLY Important?

That's the question I'm asking myself today. With three young kiddies it's so easy to lose hold of the things that are really important. The fact of life is that children need to be fed, nappies need to be changed, and behaviour issues can't be put on hold.

Needs and wants can get blurred very quickly, and there are always plenty of gentle suggestions from the sidelines about things that we really should be doing... And while there are certain core, foundational truths - e.g. the ten commandments - there is no specific formula for life (e.g. 7am - get up, 7.30am - bible study, 8am visit sick/elderly). The best method of implementing our values changes from day to day.

Even if there were a formula I guess I would struggle to follow it anyway.

So... I'm just mulling this over, meditating on how much of my time is spent doing things that really count, whether mundane or exciting. Meanwhile, we keep plodding on, and I am gradually turning some of the important things into daily habits.

My small victory at the moment is that we are actually reading the bible together (almost) every morning. I plan on incorporating more of the really important things into every day - one step at a time.

A Question of Faith...

Life is a battle right now. A battle to get out of bed every morning. A battle not to get side-tracked by the menial tasks. A battle to do the things that really should be done before the things that I just really want to do.

So what does that have to do with a question of faith? Let me answer that as clearly as I can through the fog of mother-brain.

My time and energy are being sapped by trivialities because I don't have the faith to trust that God will look over the 99.999999 (OK, you get the idea)% of the universe that I have no control over and no responsibility for. I cannot change the amount of packaging that my food comes wrapped in. No really, I can't. Three young children is more of a priority than a one-woman campaign against supermarket giants and midgets alike. SOOOO I can stop stressing myself over trying to reuse every scrap of packaging. (What about your recycle bin? I hear you say. To which my answer is that I have serious doubts about how good recycling is for the environment - better to use less to start with, in my mind).

Anyway, that's just a small example. The point is, I can't compensate for all the wrong stuff that goes on in the world. I can hate it. I can work really hard to overcome my sins through the power of God's spirit. I can teach my children. I can speak the truth in love. But I can't, can't, CAN'T by the greatest stretch of my will and strength change one single thing about any other person.

So here's to being an inspiration and encouragement to others by being the best that I can be, and having the faith that God will deal with everything else ... perfectly!

Who's Afraid of the Big, Bad World?

It seems from some of the forums that I've been on recently, there are people out there who think the world is a wonderful place, not the big, bad world at all.

I wonder if the people who believe this would like to be Wonderful World ambassadors to the child soldiers in Uganda? Or perhaps they would like to take their message of positive energy to the mothers with AIDS in Africa who will shortly be leaving their children as orphans? Maybe the children sold by their own parents to sweat shops and brothels would be enlightened by the understanding that they are part of this great planet's amazing diversity? Those who have lost their limbs to land mines might have a better attitude about their lot in life if they truly understood that they are just part of that Great Circle of Life - to eat or be eaten? What about the children in our own backyard who are abused or neglected by their own parents, is it time they learned that it's not a big, bad world at all?

NO!! The world is not a wonderful place! It has the potential to be brilliant under the right leadership. It was created with purpose, but that purpose has not been achieved, because man is fallen. The inherent goodness of man is a lie, proven by seven millenia of descent into increasing chaos. Our current world is the cumulative effect of mankind's dismal FAILURE at goodness.

Only Christ's return will bring the world to what it should be. He will bring hope not only for the living, but for the dead. Know God, and you know that He has planned for everyone. He has not neglected the millions of children who have died not even knowing His name. Like everyone else, they will have their chance.

This is what our family is about. This is where we're headed. We stumble, we fall, we get discouraged, we are HUMAN. But ultimately, we are keeping our eyes on the prize - a perfect eternity for everyone who will choose it.

Starting now...

Starting now, my life is going to be organized. Well, that's the idea, anyway! DD5 (aka The Spanner) is going to 'start' school at home next year and I have all sorts of grand plans floating around in my head.

The idea is that this blog is going to be the beginning of a little family business. Not to make money, but more to teach the girls all sorts of useful things like diligence, maths, managing money - just to name a few.

Of course, the number one goal for this family is to be heading for God's kingdom, and I have to keep reminding myself of that when I start to think about all the brilliant things I can teach The Spanner before she even turns six. Character has to be the top priority for all of us - especially The Mummy.

Thus begins the homeschooling journey of The Mummy, The Spanner, The Messie, and The Yabbie (so named until I come up with better nicknames) with The Daddy playing an essential supporting role.